Living at home with an abusive alcoholic step father

When I was a young person living at home with an abusive alcoholic step father I always thought that if I could just move out and get away from him I’d be happy. Once out on my own I discovered that there was still something within me that wasn’t quite complete. I knew as a Christian I was suppose to have joy and peace, and in some measure I did like when I was with my Christian friends or when I was at church. It wasn’t until mid-life did I realize what was lacking in my Christian walk back then and why that continuous joy was lacking in my life.  My understanding of God was flawed. I thought God’s love for me was conditional. As long as I did what my church taught me I could expect God to love me and bless me.

Once I discovered the error in my understanding of God and that He loves me unconditionally and that it’s what He did for us by dying on the cross and spilling His own blood for my sins that allows me to be acceptable to Him I have a joy that is constant. It isn’t dependent on my circumstances. I don’t have to strain in my brain to have the right kind of faith. Jesus is the author and completer of my faith.

So when preachers tell you to “fake it till you make it” please don’t take that advice. Remember God knows if we’re faking it. I’m talking about faking a joy or peace that really isn’t there. Be completely honest with Him even if you feel you can’t be honest with fellow believers. Seek Him to know Him and ask Him to reveal to you why you don’t have joy. Because the joy that comes from our Lord is NOT dependent on our circumstances. It is a continuous, everlasting joy! Jesus said that He came to give us life and life everlasting!

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